To have and to hold

Happy 33rd wedding anniversary, Mom & Dad!

They obviously hadn't intended to spend the day together in the ICU. Regardless, this week they have taught their children, family and friends an incredible lesson about unconditional love.

Dad has been with Mom as much as he possibly can, holding her hand, talking with her and being an advocate for her health. He's also been keeping others who love her informed about what's going on. On the nights I have spent with Mom in the ICU, Dad arrived early the following morning to relieve me eager to see Mom and what progress she's made.

For better or for worse, indeed. May today bring you both more wonderful moments, good news and happiness to celebrate in your life together. I love you both.


And may I say, by the way, that Mom was a total knockout on her wedding day! You're beautiful, Mom, inside and out. Hang in there!

Another good day

More good news to report on day 9 in the ICU: Mom fought off a fever today and initiated breathing for about 12 hours. She also had a test done today, but we must wait until tomorrow to hear the result. We have been telling her something she used to tell my sisters and me as we marched off to school: "Good luck on tests and junk like that!"

I am amazed by how strong she is. She is constantly poked and prodded by doctors and nurses, who must check her insulin levels, give breathing treatments, administer pain medication and more. When we're with her, we talk her through every step and hope that she can hear us on some level.

Before Mom was sedated on Sunday, I had asked her what I could bring her from home to make her stay more comfortable. She was unable to speak because of her breathing tube, but she wrote down "May" on a piece of paper. I knew that she wanted her copy of the wonderful book "Life With Mae," which I gave her for Mother's Day just a few weeks ago. I have been reading a few pages to her at a time and hope that it eases her mind.

Fan mail (get well soon cards) are pouring in. We have many on display in her ICU room. I read those to her, as well. The doctors believe that her hearing the voices of those closest to her will help her through this, so I appreciate the encouraging reading material!

(I love the photo of Mom that I've included in this post. I took it in February at a bridal boutique. Mom, Jen, Amanda, her future mother- and sister-in-law and I engaged in a day of dresses. In this photo, Mom is admiring my baby sis in her drop-dead gorgeous gown.)

Beautiful baby steps

Mom made some great progress today. We want her to be better and back on her feet, but the doctors are reminding us that every little improvement is huge right now.

Mom is still unresponsive, and we all yearn for communication from her. But it's a blessing that she showed progress with her spontaneous breathing exercises, which means for periods (nine hours today!) she was less reliant on her ventilator. The doctor also approved a change in the drug that's keeping her sedated. It's a milder drug that she is tolerating well so far. Dad and I met with Mom's pulmonologist and the pharmacist approving all of her drugs to get much-needed answers to many of our questions and concerns. A long day. Another trying day. But baby steps are still steps in the right direction.

Now time for us all to get some rest so we can be strong for her. As Mom always says, "Happy face in the morning!" Here's to the promise of another good day.

Keep those prayers a-comin!

Mom made some good progress today, including initiating breathing for six and a half hours this morning and coming down significantly on the dosage of medicine that's keeping her sedated.

She's still not able to communicate with us or respond to commands from the doctors and nurses (she doesn't squeeze your hand when instructed or look at you when you say her name, for example). The docs say that she's struggling with anxiety issues and pain and is not able to make additional progress because of it. It's clear, though, that she is aware of her surroundings to some degree. We've been asked to stay strong and positive when we're with her. I believe that she's in the process of digging down deep and finding the faith and courage to fight through this! I've heard from so many people this week who love her and who are rooting for her.

Needless to say, it's not been an easy week. But if Mom can push through, so can we. Thanks, everyone, for your faith and friendship.

Marvelous Mom

Many of you know that Mom is in Wesley's Medical Intensive Care Unit after having respiratory failure last Thursday. Right now, she is in critical condition and is sedated and on a ventilator. The doctors performed a successful tracheotomy today to help her breathe, and my family and I believe that this is a vital step to successful recovery. Mom is a fighter, and she loves life, and we have faith that she's going to wow us all as she continues to heal.

Thanks to all of you who have shared your love, prayers and support during the past week. It's been a very difficult time, and I know we'll need the help of the people who love Mom and our family to see us all through it. While she's on all of our hearts and minds, I wanted to share some of my favorite photos of her from the past several months.

Synchronized sleeping

Brian snapped this great pic of the pups napping. It's odd, but we do often find them sleeping or resting in the exact same position (note their heads resting on left paws):

Young at heart

Sunday was the end-of-the-year bash for the church youth group that Brian & I work with. Hard to believe it's the end of the school year already: Seems like we were just celebrating the beginning of the year. Quite apropos that we played water games and got messy to wrap things up. There was a giant homemade slip-and-slide.








The tweens played in the sprinklers until the church's lawn became a muddy mess.












We dined on cotton candy and sno-cones.













And I did my best to stay out of the messy games. Exhibit A: the egg game. A youth sponsor and youth group member selected eggs to crack on each other's head. The catch? One's hard-boiled. The other's raw.


If Sunday's party didn't make me feel young at heart, this evening did: I scored a 67 percent on the "under 21" quiz in the current GQ Magazine. Score! (Brian & I do recall that such percentage is a passing grade.)

Farmers market finds

Before my late morning swim today, I visited the Kansas Grown farmers market, where it was herb day. I celebrated by buying two varieties of sage. I also found a beautiful hanging flower basket (everyone needs a May Day basket, right?), a Larkspur Loaf from Delano Bakery, sugar-free banana nut bread, cinnamon twists and some locally baked dog biscuits for the pups.

Dakota & Lilly were especially excited about the large doggy treats I brought home:

The biscuits' ingredients include whole wheat flour, applesauce, peanut butter, cornmeal and rolled oats. (I confess that I tasted one, and they remind me of Grape Nuts.)

Food, folks & fun

On Friday night, Brian fired up the grill, and Tony & Nicole joined us for a scrumptious steak dinner. Besides the chilly, windy weather, our gathering contained all the makings of a great evening. Lilly wanted to play catch nonstop. I won our poker game. We split a delicious bottle of Stephen Vincent cab. And Eric arrived in town for a weekend visit. Cheers, and happy weekend!

Wait no more

Earlier this week, I finished reading "Waiting: The True Confessions of a Waitress" by author and former waitress Debra Ginsberg. The book is part memoir, part social commentary, a la "Nickel and Dimed: On (Not) Getting by in America" by Barbara Ehrenreich. Portions included behind-the-scene restaurant confessions, not unlike those in Anthony Bourdain's "Kitchen Confidential: Adventures in the Culinary Underbelly."

I enjoyed Ginsberg's book and am interested in reading several others she's recently written. For now, though, I'll share with you a few things I learned from "Waiting" ...

Don't worry about decaf coffee: "There is a general rule of thumb for every restaurant I've worked in: the more a customer protests the need for decaf, the likelier the possibility that he will receive regular ... The honest answer? No, it's probably not decaf."

Visitors don't enjoy our June heat, either: "I celebrated by twentieth birthday in the endless state of Kansas under a blistering June sun ... For hours, all we heard were songs by Toto (appropriately enough) ... To this day, I can't hear 'Rosanna' without having an instant vision of the parched grasses and endless highway running through Kansas."

Restaurant employees cook up much more than dinner. Just read Chapter 9, "Food and sex."

Big storm? Hail, yes!

We had a little hailstorm in Ta-town tonight. Let's call it Wichita on ice.












At our house, ice is a treat for Dakota, who is still on a doggy diet. (Five pounds down so far!) Bottoms up, Snoders: